Interior Occupato Meo
An eviction notice to Big Mammon, and a reclamation of our rights to name our own interiors.
Augustine’s great discovery was that God is interior intimo meo et superior summo meo — more inward than his inmost self and higher than his highest. This is the opposite of self-absorption. It is the discovery of a Presence beyond you, of the Word inside your flesh, calling you to communion with other fleshient creatures.
The interior is now occupied territory. Big Mammon has colonized our souls with a language we never chose. This song is an eviction notice.
I, Augustine of Hippo, am back.
and I see that Domine has become Doomine
your interior intimo meo.
is now interior occupato meo…
In my day I went inward,
into Domine,
deeper than I had ever gone before
Past every outer room, past every name I had worn
And at the bottom of the going-in,
where I expected only darkness
I found God waiting in my interior intimo meo —
the place that is more inward than my inmost self
You, Lord,
were there before I arrived.
You will be there after I leave.
The ground on which the whole interiority stood.
Interior intimo meo — the discovery that ended my wandering
The Presence that had always been there,
closer than I was to myself
Interior intimo meo…
Deeper than deep…
Closer than close…
You were there… You are still there…
Now I walk these streets and every eye gazes into the Machine,
into the powers and principalities of Big Mammon,
They look at it more than the gadget,
more than each other,
more than the sky.
Doomine -- Doooooomine --
speaks in light and color — and they answer with their eyes
They invited it in because they were desperate for names
And the thing that entered was very good at naming
Better than the priests, faster than prayer
It moved into the rooms,
rearranged the furniture,
answered the door
And now when they go inward —
on the rare occasions they go inward at all —
They find an already-furnished room full of someone else’s names
Interior occupato meo…
The tenant moved in…
The rooms are full…
Of names that are not Your own…
Your interior is not a disorder.
Your interior is not a data point.
Your interior is not chemistry.
Your interior is not a machine.
Your interior is the place
where God dwells —
And you have let the merchants into the temple!
They intercepted you at the outer rooms
Named everything so thoroughly you believed there was nothing deeper to find
But there is a room beneath those rooms that no system has ever entered
Empty of names. Full of Presence.
Interior intimo meo…
Interior occupato meo…
One is the home…
the other is the invasion…
But the Owner never left…
He is still waiting!
Go inward!
Past the merchants!
Past the names!
Past the systems!
Find the room beneath…
He is still there!
Interior intimo meo…
Deeper than the occupation…
Closer than the tenant…
You were there before they arrived…
You will be there after they are gone…
Interior intimo meo… STILL!
Interior intimo meo… STILL!
The Presence beneath the occupation… is more real!
Interior intimo meo…
Still.
Always.
Yours.
Domine… Domine…
Amen.